Not really making progress lately. *sighs* I just need to eat more, but I keep getting busy and forgetting. I was 164 still this morning. I'll fix this though, don't worry.
But I have been noticing things a lot more lately.. little changes.. like how the only pair of jeans that isn't super tight on me are the new ones I bought! And I put on an old pair of boy shorts I have and they were tight on my legs. THEY WERE ALWAYS LOOSE BEFORE. So I guess that proves my thighs and booty are in on this.
My girlfriend said my bra was tight this morning. And I've noticed my hands are fuller now. Which I actually really like! But it's getting harder and harder to take off my ring which used to be so loose it would almost fall off by itself. It's weird too how right when I gain new pounds I feel it in my neck. I really do, but then if I wait, the fat disperses through my body. I think its still going to my chest this time, and belly area.
And that was the other thing I noticed. I mean, looking the mirror this morning I was just like whoa.. I've definately gained a lot. I mean my belly sticks out for sure. There is no way people are not noticing that. And from the side sometimes I feel sad. I don't know. I kinda prided myself on being skinny and well, no one has complemented me on how thin I am in quite awhile... gee I wonder why that is.. maybe cuz I'm not thin anymore? lol
But I'm loving a lot about this. I like being softer. I like the experience. I like my face way better! I like my chest, legs and my belly could be a little smaller but that's okay. I dunno.. this whole thing is just so crazy.
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6 comments:
Dear don’t’ worry you are always smart and beautiful, I think that many people think that you are mast beautiful than before, but all people doesn’t admitted that, maybe couse all the media and media stereotypes tell us that skinny girl is what we needs and want! But I think that your choose and decision is the best you can do for your self… woman… for be a woman ….(and not a girl), must be soft… with a lovely imperfection… PS I apologise for my bed English dear, I writing for Switzerland, homeland of chocolate…bank and watch…
The negative feedback was hard for me to understand and accept. But gosh, it felt so good to let go and gain. even though I was not even trying to do that.
yah, its not fun exactly.. but I can handle it. I'm living my dreams here! =)
You're doing great. As with any change or moving forward we have to move away from the past. We need to focus on the positive new experiences and changes. You say you feel a bit sad because you used to pride your self on being skinny. Stace you look so much nicer now. You deserve to pride yourself on becoming softer, and curvier. Pride yourself on living your dream.
Pride yourself on having the courage to face a bit of scrutiny. Pride yourself on expanding your world (literally and figuratively). You have such support, just know you are never alone in reaching your dreams.
thanks worldly.. that makes a lot of sense and ur right! I can pride myself on a lot of things.. like doing what I want to do in my heart instead of just conforming like i've always done.
as always, there are some very wise comments here. you look wonderful! it takes a very strong person to fly in the face of convention. you should take pride in being that kind of person.
actually i think it is really cool that the skinny comments have slowed down. that's a good sign. :)
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